Your thoughts on eloping

sweet pee · Postby **sweet pee** » February 20th, 2017, 4:36 pm

Hi everyone I would like to get your thoughts on how trinidad on a cultural level deals with eloping. Is it taboo? Can it be done here? Will you nenen beat you with a cocyea broom? lol

anyway me and my SO are thinking of traveling abroad to get eloped so to avoid holding a big ceremony only for strangers we never met to come and eat out we food :lol:

So what about eloping and having a better honeymoon sooo does anyone know how it can be done? Thanks

xoxo

Dizzy28 · Postby **Dizzy28** » February 20th, 2017, 4:41 pm

You wouldn't be married in Trinidad if you elope in another country.
Unless you plan to register (Civil Marriage) before or after your foreign elope.

Slartibartfast · Postby **Slartibartfast** » February 20th, 2017, 4:44 pm

Sorry I

Good. Got that out of the way early. Hopefully OP gets some serious replies.

Slartibartfast · Postby **Slartibartfast** » February 20th, 2017, 4:51 pm

sweet pee wrote:Hi everyone I would like to get your thoughts on how trinidad on a cultural level deals with eloping. Is it taboo? Can it be done here? Will you nenen beat you with a cocyea broom? lol anyway me and my SO are thinking of traveling abroad to get eloped so to avoid holding a big ceremony only for strangers we never met to come and eat out we food So what about eloping and having a better honeymoon sooo does anyone know how it can be done? Thanks xoxo

Unless you are marrying the SO's parents you should be fine. If you are... then you have bigger problems to deal with.

On a serious note, don't elope. It creates unnecessary rifts between the couple and the in-laws. If they are against you guys getting married then inform them that you guys are getting married. Let them know they it would mean a lot to you guys to have their support but it is not their decision to make and you guys are going to do what you going to do anyway.

As for travelling abroad to do it; nothing wrong with that. Invite everyone you want and tell them meet you in the country of your choosing. Your RSVP list will practically take care of itself. Extra points if you use the facilities that you booked in so that they have to pay for whatever the eat/ drink.

TL:DR Don't hide your marriage from your family. Remember you getting married to your SO and just do what you guys agree is best. Nothing wrong with a small ceremony so you could have a nice honeymoon. Wish you all the best!

88sins · Postby **88sins** » February 20th, 2017, 5:38 pm

op, hear dis nuh

It will cost more financially and family wise to elope overseas than it would if you were to just grow up a little and get married right here and invite only the people you want to share this with you & your s/o.

There's a huge difference between getting married and keeping a wedding. I hope u both know what you doing.

Gladiator · Postby **Gladiator** » February 20th, 2017, 5:43 pm

sweet pee wrote:Hi everyone I would like to get your thoughts on how trinidad on a cultural level deals with eloping. Is it taboo? Can it be done here? Will you nenen beat you with a cocyea broom? lol anyway me and my SO are thinking of traveling abroad to get eloped so to avoid holding a big ceremony only for strangers we never met to come and eat out we food So what about eloping and having a better honeymoon sooo does anyone know how it can be done? Thanks xoxo

Go to Sandals, take the wedding package.... enjoy yourself.... come back home as tell everybody to fack off!!!

desifemlove · Postby **desifemlove** » February 20th, 2017, 5:54 pm

strangers who your parents wish to invite.

ok...but you both sound a bit spoilt, and a bit spineless too. have you discussed this with your parents? if they've said no, then suck it up. they will want to invite people too, and you such shitty social skills but to ignore or just say "hello" to these people whom your family possibly invited to see their son's special day?

ok this is rude. but then seems you're being a bit ungrateful here.

VexXx Dogg · Postby **VexXx Dogg** » February 20th, 2017, 7:28 pm

have a good relationship with your parents? suck it up and compromise
don't give a sheit about family? elope away

*KRONIK* · Postby ***KRONIK*** » February 20th, 2017, 7:43 pm

88sins wrote:
There's a huge difference between getting married and keeping a wedding.

This!

88sins · Postby **88sins** » February 20th, 2017, 7:43 pm

VexXx Dogg wrote:have a good relationship with your parents? suck it up and compromise
don't give a sheit about family? elope away

or like I said, grow up, let mommy & daddy know that you don't want a circus, so do't be inviting every halfwit jackass they know.
This is YOUR wedding, so the only one to call the shots on who is invited or allowed to attend is you & your spouse to be. Not mammee, dahdee, mamme-in-law or dahdee-in-law.

there's absolutely nothing wrong with not inviting certain relatives you don't know or don't like. is your ceremony on your day.
my father in law was not there for my wedding. He did show up, but he was not invited, so he got stopped at the gate, both for the ceremony & the reception. he didn't like me before, that didn't help him like me after, & i still couldn't give a hairy rat turd about his emotions about me or that day.

op, if yuh can't be adult or grown up enough take charge of your own wedding, how the hell you plan to take charge of the rest of yuh life?

supercharged turbo · Postby **supercharged turbo** » February 20th, 2017, 8:26 pm

You thinking too short term.What about if you have kids later on with your SO?Wouldn't you like your kids to have a good relationship with their grandparents without unnecessary tension in the background?OP sounding like meh ex

ruffneck_12 · Postby **ruffneck_12** » February 20th, 2017, 9:08 pm

Love is just a chemical in the brain. A drug

The drug wears off over time. Go ahead and chase gratification and come crawling back home groveling

HSA · Postby **HSA** » February 21st, 2017, 6:02 am

make sure and get yuh moms and pops blessing 1st...same for the other half....
that is all that matters...

racedriverpro · Postby **racedriverpro** » February 21st, 2017, 9:38 am

Stopped reading at SO.

cherrypopper · Postby **cherrypopper** » February 21st, 2017, 9:57 am

Get tested first ..

Country_Bookie · Postby **Country_Bookie** » February 21st, 2017, 10:28 am

I’d suggest you and your SO sit down with both sets of parents and discuss this before u make a decision like eloping. Let them know ur budget for the wedding is $X and with that you can’t afford a big wedding. U might be able to afford a small wedding at a restaurant where u won’t have to pay separate costs for venue, decorator, caterer, drinks, serving staff, bar staff (trust me all these costs add up). Leave the ball in the parents court so that they know if THEY really want to have a big wedding then THEY have to fork out the cash to pay for it.
If they’re not inclined to pay a big wedding then bring up the idea of going to another country and see if they’d be willing to travel for the wedding. Parents like to know they were at least consulted when u make such a big decision.

Slartibartfast · Postby **Slartibartfast** » February 21st, 2017, 10:40 am

Country_Bookie wrote:I’d suggest you and your SO sit down with both sets of parents and discuss this before u make a decision like eloping.

Brah... I don't think that's how eloping works. I think you just call that getting married.

Chimera · Postby **Chimera** » February 21st, 2017, 10:48 am

you just hadda go civil registry and register quietly

tell family after "aye we get married d other day, will do wedding later down the line"

never do the wedding later down the line.

win win

dougla_boy · Postby **dougla_boy** » February 21st, 2017, 11:13 am

do it at the Ministry of Legal Affairs, or a small church.... cant go wrong. .go cost yuh a lil $25 or so....spend the money u would have spent on a lil honeymoon.....why have a big wedding to let people who u dont speak to often come and bad talk your food and all kinda sh!t..... eff that.... i support u go legal affairs and do yuh ting

dougla_boy · Postby **dougla_boy** » February 21st, 2017, 11:16 am

desifemlove wrote:strangers who your parents wish to invite.

ok...but you both sound a bit spoilt, and a bit spineless too. have you discussed this with your parents? if they've said no, then suck it up. they will want to invite people too, and you such shitty social skills but to ignore or just say "hello" to these people whom your family possibly invited to see their son's special day?

ok this is rude. but then seems you're being a bit ungrateful here.

why must they suck it up.... is they that have to spend their lives together, why they hadda compromise and let their parents invite people..... and how are they being ungrateful? its their choice....

desifemlove · Postby **desifemlove** » February 21st, 2017, 11:18 am

dougla_boy wrote:
desifemlove wrote:strangers who your parents wish to invite.

ok...but you both sound a bit spoilt, and a bit spineless too. have you discussed this with your parents? if they've said no, then suck it up. they will want to invite people too, and you such shitty social skills but to ignore or just say "hello" to these people whom your family possibly invited to see their son's special day?

ok this is rude. but then seems you're being a bit ungrateful here.

why must they suck it up.... is they that have to spend their lives together, why they hadda compromise and let their parents invite people..... and how are they being ungrateful? its their choice....

because he's acting whiny......and nobody knows the entire scenario here. don't you like opinions, fella?

dougla_boy · Postby **dougla_boy** » February 21st, 2017, 11:20 am

u cant assume that they being whiny....u not in the situation,,,so u dont know what pressure he/she may be getting from parents...... again, its their wedding.....

desifemlove · Postby **desifemlove** » February 21st, 2017, 11:22 am

depends. parents often bring guests. but cool, get offended and pissy haha.

dougla_boy · Postby **dougla_boy** » February 21st, 2017, 12:07 pm

desifemlove wrote:depends. parents often bring guests. but cool, get offended and pissy haha.

again, it is their wedding,,,,wtf parents hadda do with it unless they paying the bill?

4a70 · Postby **4a70** » February 21st, 2017, 12:43 pm

Me and so was planing to get married last yr, unfortunatly we had a death in the family, so stay of execution.... but i was footing the cost of the wedding, i wanted. The plan was a beach wedding in tobago with 10ppl all paid for by me. He pearants ( who real backaday) kick brass nah we want it here for tanty and unkl dem to drink up.
So i was like ok lewe compromise church wedding den to north deck 50ppl... still paid for by me no alchol.
She fada complain where dat dat to far... we go have it here by me. At that point we had the death and its off for now... but whenever we start planing out with he.....

Morale of d story doh try to make anyone else happy. This is your day! Remember each gust has a cost. And you and your wife are starting a life together ud b happy for that money to do so.

supercharged turbo · Postby **supercharged turbo** » February 21st, 2017, 2:56 pm

Good advice in here so far

desifemlove · Postby **desifemlove** » February 21st, 2017, 3:14 pm

dougla_boy wrote:
desifemlove wrote:depends. parents often bring guests. but cool, get offended and pissy haha.

again, it is their wedding,,,,wtf parents hadda do with it unless they paying the bill?

cos the parents could be funding it. it could be an entire family thing.

Postby **Monk BANzai** » February 21st, 2017, 6:28 pm

more and more couples are taking up the Sandal's offer to go Barbados or St Lucia and get married there and spend a 4 nights as part of the package price. My mechanic did it last December. Hassle free and who yuh eh want there well... lol...

viedcht · Postby **viedcht** » February 21st, 2017, 6:36 pm

Phone Surgeon wrote:you just hadda go civil registry and register quietly

tell family after "aye we get married d other day, will do wedding later down the line"

never do the wedding later down the line.

win win

Best idea right here^

supercharged turbo wrote:You thinking too short term.What about if you have kids later on with your SO?Wouldn't you like your kids to have a good relationship with their grandparents without unnecessary tension in the background?OP sounding like meh ex

rspann · Postby **rspann** » February 22nd, 2017, 6:40 am

Op, just be careful if you do decide to have the wedding. Watch who you hiring. I heard about an Indian wedding where the person contracted to sing ran away with the bride.

Ramkissoon pull ah tune in ah wedding, and he run away wid de dulahin.