stalest joke competiition

[mammoo]

Shupid Guyanese
A Trini guy, a Guyanese man, a beautiful girl and an old woman are
sitting in a train. The train suddenly goes thru a tunnel and .. it
gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a
slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The old woman, beautiful girl
and the Trini guy are sitting there looking perplexed. The Guyanese is
bent over holding his face which is red from an apparent slap.
1. The old woman is thinking : That Guyanese guy must have tried to
kiss that girl and got slapped.
The Guyanese is thinking : "Damn it,that Trini guy must have tried to
kiss the beautiful girl, she thought it was me and slapped me
instead."
The beautiful girl is thinking : "That Guyanese must have moved to
kiss me,but kissed the old lady instead and got slapped."
The Trini is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I
could make another kissing sound and slap that Guyanese again

[nos_specialist]

^^^ EPICCCCC

[Alpha_2nr]

Shupid Guyanese
A Trini guy, a Guyanese man, a beautiful girl and an old woman are
sitting in a train. The train suddenly goes thru a tunnel and .. it
gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a
slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The old woman, beautiful girl
and the Trini guy are sitting there looking perplexed. The Guyanese is
bent over holding his face which is red from an apparent slap.
1. The old woman is thinking : That Guyanese guy must have tried to
kiss that girl and got slapped.
The Guyanese is thinking : "Damn it,that Trini guy must have tried to
kiss the beautiful girl, she thought it was me and slapped me
instead."
The beautiful girl is thinking : "That Guyanese must have moved to
kiss me,but kissed the old lady instead and got slapped."
The Trini is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I
could make another kissing sound and slap that Guyanese again

WIN!!!!

[AYE_SOLDIER]

[sharkman121]

Shupid Guyanese
A Trini guy, a Guyanese man, a beautiful girl and an old woman are
sitting in a train. The train suddenly goes thru a tunnel and .. it
gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a
slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The old woman, beautiful girl
and the Trini guy are sitting there looking perplexed. The Guyanese is
bent over holding his face which is red from an apparent slap.
1. The old woman is thinking : That Guyanese guy must have tried to
kiss that girl and got slapped.
The Guyanese is thinking : "Damn it,that Trini guy must have tried to
kiss the beautiful girl, she thought it was me and slapped me
instead."
The beautiful girl is thinking : "That Guyanese must have moved to
kiss me,but kissed the old lady instead and got slapped."
The Trini is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I
could make another kissing sound and slap that Guyanese again

[DRAGULA]

a dyslexic man walks into a bra....

[SmokeyGTi]

[Mitsubishi Maniac]

Okay so a man walking down the beach one day.Saw a bottle laying down on the sand.Out of sheer curiosity and crazyness decides to kick the bottle.To the man's surprise a genie came out granting him 3 wishes.The man becomes rather excited now.Man says '' Genie,ah want to long........,Genie ah want to be brown............ and Genie ah want to be strong...........Genie replied '' Wish granted and turned the man into a TOOLUM!

Moral is be careful what you ask for.Yeah ah know it stale,but spare meh nah!..........

[lighthammer]

A scottish farmer was out in the town pub, having some drinks after work.
It was a friday evening, the night was chilly and the ale was warm, so our scottish friend drank heartily and deeply. Towards the end of the night, the bartender had to turn his customers out so he could close up shop.

After stepping out into the cold night air, the scottish farmer drunkenly staggered down the dirt road heading into the Scotland hills, back to his farm. He barely made it 20 yards when he decided to relieve himself on the side of the road. He trundled to the bushes, hiked up his kilt and let loose. A warm feeling of relief came over our friend. After he finished urinating, he turned about and headed back down the dirt road.

After 10 steps, the ale in our scotsman friend's head was too much - he staggered and then collapsed on the edge of the road, fast asleep.

At dawn, a merry young milkmaid on her way to market came skipping down the road and spied our scotsman snoring loudly on the grass. Curious to see if it was true that Scotsmen don't wear anything under their kilts, the naughty maid lifted up the kilt. She found that the myth was in fact true, and giggled at her discovery. She unwrapped a blue ribbon from her hair and tied it around our scotsman's member, as a prize. She then skipped on down the road, giggling to herself.

An hour later the scottish man woke up, got up and dusted himself off. He was puzzled and surprised to see the ribbon tied around his manhood. After a few seconds of staring down at himself, he finally declared: (use your best Scottish-accent)

"Well, ah dunno wer' ya' been laddie, buh ah'm glad tuh see ya' won ferst prize!!"


The End.

[Ronaldo95163]

What kind of teeth can you get for a dollar?

Buck teeth



Why were the fruits angry at the magician?

Because he disappear

[slacker0012]

wa kinda van rasta does drive










HILUX

[Ronaldo95163]

Why can't you break into a rasta man's house?



He have dreadlocks

[zcarz]

Read carefully to understand:
A few years ago, a little boy finished his first second year of primary school. It had been a very tough transition from pre-school to kindergarten, but he had worked very hard at learning to read and he made a lot of friends. His dad said, "Son, you did a great job this year, and as a reward, I will get you a present. What would you like?"
"I want one pink ping pong ball," said the boy. His dad thought that was strange and asked why. The son said, "Don't worry, I'll tell you when I graduate from secondary school."
The next year, he finished Standard 1 and once again his dad was very proud of him. He was doing really well in math and spelling, and he had lots of friends. "Son," said his dad, "You had a great year. What would you like for a present?"
"I want five pink ping pong balls," said his son. "What are you going to do with all these pink ping pong balls?" asked his dad. "I'll tell you when I graduate," said the son.
A few more years passed, and soon the son finished Standard 5. He passed for his first choice and he had started playing football. His dad said, "Son, I'm so proud of you, and I'm going to get you a present. What would you like?" The son said, "I want 25 pink ping pong balls." His dad said, "Son, I'd really like to know what you are doing with all of these ping pong balls." The son said, "Dad, I'll tell you when I graduate."
A few years later, the son finished Form 4. It was another tough transition into O levels, but he had kept his grades up and he was still playing football. His dad said, "Son, you did a great job this year. What would you like for a present?" The son said, " I want 100 pink ping pong balls." "Son," said the dad, exasperated, "what are you doing with all of these ping pong balls?" "I'll tell you when I graduate," he replied.
Form 5 was another good year. The son did well in all of his subjects and even helped out in charities. His dad was really proud of him, and offered once again to get him a present. "I want 500 pink ping pong balls," said the son. "Son, please tell me what you are doing with all of these ping pong balls," said his dad. "I'll tell you when I graduate out of Form 6," said his son.
Lower 6: going to high school was tough, but still good. He ran for student council President and won. He also made the national U-17 football team. His dad was so proud of him. "Son, you are amazing! I will get you a big present this year. What do you want?" "I want a warehouse full of pink ping pong balls," said his son. "Tell me what you're doing with all of these pink ping pong balls!" demanded his father. "I'll tell you when I graduate," said his son. His father was reluctant but he obliged his son.

Upper 6 was perfect. He was the valedictorian, captain of every sports team in the school in, a member of every club, he got all distinctions in 12 units at CAPE and got into every university he applied to, including Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Oxford, and Imperial. He was also extremely sexy and had a flaccid penile length of 8.5 inches. "Son," said his dad, "You are the greatest person on the face of the earth. It is a privilege to be your father. I will give you anything you want. Money, cars, a house-- anything you want, you name it, it's yours. I am so proud of you." "Dad, I want a tanker full of pink ping pong balls," said his son. "Son, you're going to university now. Please tell me what you're doing with all of these ping pong balls." "I'll tell you tomorrow night after graduation," said his son.
The next day, the son was driving to graduation and was involved in a horrible car accident. He was rushed to the Eric Williams Medical Sciences Complex where he was listed in very critical condition. His dad went over to his bed and told him he loved him and how proud he was. Then he asked the question that had been plaguing him for so many years: "Son," he said, "I have to know. What are you doing with all of those pink ping pong balls?" He requested some water from the nurse. She came back, placed it on the bedside table and left. The son, after much deliberation took a sip of water, opened his mouth to answer him, choked and died.

[bluesteel29]

daz ah fawlkin novel u write dey orrr

[zcarz]

daz ah fawlkin novel u write dey orrr

insomnia is not a nice thing

[geodude]

Read carefully to understand:
A few years ago, a little boy finished his first second year of primary school. It had been a very tough transition from pre-school to kindergarten, but he had worked very hard at learning to read and he made a lot of friends. His dad said, "Son, you did a great job this year, and as a reward, I will get you a present. What would you like?"
"I want one pink ping pong ball," said the boy. His dad thought that was strange and asked why. The son said, "Don't worry, I'll tell you when I graduate from secondary school."
The next year, he finished Standard 1 and once again his dad was very proud of him. He was doing really well in math and spelling, and he had lots of friends. "Son," said his dad, "You had a great year. What would you like for a present?"
"I want five pink ping pong balls," said his son. "What are you going to do with all these pink ping pong balls?" asked his dad. "I'll tell you when I graduate," said the son.
A few more years passed, and soon the son finished Standard 5. He passed for his first choice and he had started playing football. His dad said, "Son, I'm so proud of you, and I'm going to get you a present. What would you like?" The son said, "I want 25 pink ping pong balls." His dad said, "Son, I'd really like to know what you are doing with all of these ping pong balls." The son said, "Dad, I'll tell you when I graduate."
A few years later, the son finished Form 4. It was another tough transition into O levels, but he had kept his grades up and he was still playing football. His dad said, "Son, you did a great job this year. What would you like for a present?" The son said, " I want 100 pink ping pong balls." "Son," said the dad, exasperated, "what are you doing with all of these ping pong balls?" "I'll tell you when I graduate," he replied.
Form 5 was another good year. The son did well in all of his subjects and even helped out in charities. His dad was really proud of him, and offered once again to get him a present. "I want 500 pink ping pong balls," said the son. "Son, please tell me what you are doing with all of these ping pong balls," said his dad. "I'll tell you when I graduate out of Form 6," said his son.
Lower 6: going to high school was tough, but still good. He ran for student council President and won. He also made the national U-17 football team. His dad was so proud of him. "Son, you are amazing! I will get you a big present this year. What do you want?" "I want a warehouse full of pink ping pong balls," said his son. "Tell me what you're doing with all of these pink ping pong balls!" demanded his father. "I'll tell you when I graduate," said his son. His father was reluctant but he obliged his son.

Upper 6 was perfect. He was the valedictorian, captain of every sports team in the school in, a member of every club, he got all distinctions in 12 units at CAPE and got into every university he applied to, including Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Oxford, and Imperial. He was also extremely sexy and had a flaccid penile length of 8.5 inches. "Son," said his dad, "You are the greatest person on the face of the earth. It is a privilege to be your father. I will give you anything you want. Money, cars, a house-- anything you want, you name it, it's yours. I am so proud of you." "Dad, I want a tanker full of pink ping pong balls," said his son. "Son, you're going to university now. Please tell me what you're doing with all of these ping pong balls." "I'll tell you tomorrow night after graduation," said his son.
The next day, the son was driving to graduation and was involved in a horrible car accident. He was rushed to the Eric Williams Medical Sciences Complex where he was listed in very critical condition. His dad went over to his bed and told him he loved him and how proud he was. Then he asked the question that had been plaguing him for so many years: "Son," he said, "I have to know. What are you doing with all of those pink ping pong balls?" He requested some water from the nurse. She came back, placed it on the bedside table and left. The son, after much deliberation took a sip of water, opened his mouth to answer him, choked and died.

i doh get it

[Mark!]

i doh get it

pink ping pong ballz are the answer to all your problems

[zcarz]

it not funny? teehee

[SimSimmer69]

Did you hear about the blind circumsizer? - he got the sack.

[SimSimmer69]

.
./|
|.|\...............
..|=D..--------
../\....\..........|
.|.| __|..........\_

[SimSimmer69]

Stephen Spielberg is casting for a new film based around the great
> composers.
>
> To give the film a twist and some "oomph" he decides to cast the the
> great action heroes of today in the leading roles. He calls Sylvester
> Stallone, Arnie Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis and Steven Seagal into his
> office to hear who they would like to play:
>
> "Well," began Stallone, "I've always admired Mozart. I would love to
> play him."
>
> "Chopin has always been my favourite, and my image would improve if
> people saw me playing the piano" says Willis. "I'll play him."
>
> "I've always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes," says Seagal. "I'd
> like to play him."
>
> "Splendid", says Spielberg, very pleased with these choices.
>
> Then,turning to Schwarzenegger, he asks, "Who do you want to be,
> Arnold?"
>
> So Arnold says ....
>
> Wait for it, it's a beauty..........
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> "I'll be Bach!"

[mitsu_chick941]

A man goes to his doctor and complains that his wife hasn't wanted to have sex with him for the past six months.

The doctor tells the man to bring his wife in so he can talk to her and hopefully determine what the problem is.

The following day, the wife goes to the doctor's office. The doctor asks her what's wrong, why doesn't she want to have sex with her husband?

"Oh, that's easily explained. For the past six months," the wife says, "I've been taking a cab to work every morning. I don't have any money. The cab driver asks me, 'Are you going to pay today, or what?' So, I take an 'or what'."

"Then, when I get to work," she continues, "I'm late, so the boss asks me, 'Are we going to write this down in the book, or what?' So, I take an 'or what'.

I take a cab to go home after work and, as usual, I have no money. The cab driver asks me again, 'So, are you going to pay this time, or what?' Again, I take an 'or what'.

So you see, doc, by the time I get home I'm all tired out and don't want it anymore."

"Yes, I see," replies the doctor. "So, are we going to tell your husband, or what?"

[mitsu_chick941]

The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently
born foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again."

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,
OKAY!

[geodude]

^^^ he he
nice

[partsman]

What you call a fella with no shins ?



tony .

[..77.]

A couple in theyre mid 50,s are lying on the bed . Slowly the man begins to feel around his wife,s arm , then up to her shoulder , then across her breasts , down across her stomach , gently across the hip , down along her leg and finally slips his hand between her thighs . He feels around for a bit , stops and pulls his hand away .
After a few moments his wife says quietly , Honey , why did you stop ??
I found the remote he says and changes the channel
..77.

[triniangie]

@ pink ping pong ballz

[mitsu_chick941]

Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN?

A: Because when they come, they're wild and wet. But when they go, they take your house and car with them.


Q: What is a man's Ultimate embarrassment?

A: Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.

[DJShortCircuit]

hottgyul yuh is ah baddis ah wa, wah kinda avatar is dat

[Bizzare]

hottgyul yuh is ah baddis ah wa, wah kinda avatar is dat

Oh no, he did not......