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stalest joke competiition

this is how we do it.......

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bluesteel29
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Postby bluesteel29 » April 8th, 2010, 4:39 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Kronik
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Postby Kronik » April 9th, 2010, 8:01 am

LOCO wrote:A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts,which he gratefully munches up.

After about 45 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture two more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again ....he asks the little old lady, 'Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself?'.

'We can't chew them because we have no teeth', she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, 'Why do you buy them then?'

The old lady replied, 'We just love the chocolate around them.'


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

:sick: :sick:

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speedfreak44
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Postby speedfreak44 » April 17th, 2010, 7:12 am

:oops: :oops: :oops:

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Postby ebonysweetness69 » April 18th, 2010, 7:21 pm

A son asked his mother the following question:
'Mom, why are wedding dresses white?' The mother looks at her son and replies:
'Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure.'
The son thanks his Mom and goes off to double-check this with his father.
'Dad why are wedding dresses white?'
The father looks at his son in surprise and says:











'Son, all household appliances come in white.'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya' be saying' a mass for the poor creature?"
Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the creature."
Muldoon said, "I'll go right away Father. Do ya' think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?"
Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why did ya' not tell me the dog was Catholic?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A priest and a rabbi are in a car crash and it's a bad one. Both of their cars are demolished but amazingly neither one of them is hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the rabbi says, "So you're a priest. That's interesting; I'm a rabbi. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace."
The priest replies, "Oh, yes, I agree. It's a miracle that we survived and are here together."
"And here's another miracle," says the rabbi. "My car is destroyed but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink the wine and celebrate our good fortune," he says, handing the bottle to the priest.
The priest nods in agreement, opens the wine, drinks half of it, and hands it back to the rabbi.
The rabbi takes it and puts the cap back on.
"Aren't you going to have any? asks the priest.
"Not right now," says the rabbi. "I think I'll wait until after the police make their report."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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integra
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Postby integra » April 18th, 2010, 9:03 pm

HUH

????????????

HUH

:? :? :? :?

Chimera
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Postby Chimera » April 18th, 2010, 9:17 pm

evo_chic wrote:
ABA Trading LTD wrote:
hong kong phooey wrote:[quote="ABA Trading LTD"]She stopped replying to that facebook account and that add.

But on another account I have, she msged me on a new listing I had created last night for a different item.

Image


LOL but daz nuh a stale joke


It only stale coz

[spoiler]Image[/spoiler][/quote]

You are a bit slow arent you?

The part I blacked out was for tuner purposes only, it has the name of the facebook account I was using.
I don't want to be known here.

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masterofmindz
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Postby masterofmindz » April 19th, 2010, 9:21 pm

Q: How many Chinese it have in parliament???
A: 1, Chin-Lee
Me: Wrong, 3....Chinlee, Rowley, Valley

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Postby Rassyroots » April 19th, 2010, 11:34 pm

ahahhahahaaha Now dat is a stale joke!!!!!

xVJx
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Postby xVJx » April 22nd, 2010, 12:03 pm

hahaha!! na jed!! allyuh making me wanna read this thread from page 1!

Newayz.... what happened to Neyo's chain??












It MISS-IN-D-PENDANT

buh dum ching!!!!!!! :)

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Postby azoturbo » April 22nd, 2010, 12:26 pm

xVJx wrote:hahaha!! na jed!! allyuh making me wanna read this thread from page 1!

Newayz.... what happened to Neyo's cha











It MISS-IN-D-PENDANT

buh dum ching!!!!!!! :)

hahahahaha

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sharkman121
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Postby sharkman121 » April 22nd, 2010, 1:09 pm

xVJx wrote:hahaha!! na jed!! allyuh making me wanna read this thread from page 1!

Newayz.... what happened to Neyo's chain??








It MISS-IN-D-PENDANT

buh dum ching!!!!!!!





STEUPSSSSSS





But i still lol'ed
:lol: :lol: :lol:

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masterofmindz
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Postby masterofmindz » April 22nd, 2010, 1:27 pm

xVJx wrote:hahaha!! na jed!! allyuh making me wanna read this thread from page 1!

Newayz.... what happened to Neyo's chain??












It MISS-IN-D-PENDANT

buh dum ching!!!!!!! :)




hahahhahaaaa :P :P :P :P

xVJx
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Postby xVJx » April 22nd, 2010, 2:25 pm

ite ite hear dis 1!!!!!!

A man n woman bounce up in chaguanas. They never see each other in 10 years cuz the woman migrate. So the man ask the woman hw com she back in trini n in a rel American accent she replied tht she gonna get married to a Mexican Doctor. She invite him to the wedding n they went their way.

Wedding day now the man dress up rel nice n thing cuz he expectin rel sophisticated ppl to be there. Wen he almost reach from a gud distance he hearin dub, reggae, rap blastin rel loud from the house. ppl smokin in front n thing.

He see one a padna n was like: "This is how doctors carry about themselves now?"
The man replied: "What doctor??? She gettin married to a MAXI CONDUCTOR!"

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

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2 d Max Auto
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Postby 2 d Max Auto » April 22nd, 2010, 2:27 pm

Been reading this thread for a while........still haven't read all pages so forgive me if my contribution is a repost :)

A Mexican couple had twin sons........they named the first Jose

guess what they named the other


























Hose - B.............:lol: ...........remember it's the stalest joke thread eh :(

xVJx
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Postby xVJx » April 22nd, 2010, 2:30 pm

2 d Max Auto wrote:Been reading this thread for a while........still haven't read all pages so forgive me if my contribution is a repost :)

A Mexican couple had twin sons........they named the first Jose

guess what they named the other


























Hose - B.............:lol: ........... :(



hahahahahaha

jsali
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Postby jsali » April 22nd, 2010, 2:56 pm

yuh hear about the man who died in Courts?





he fell on a Sharp tv :cry:

xVJx
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Postby xVJx » April 22nd, 2010, 4:16 pm

Ah priest an ah rabbi walk in to ah bar rite











And dey hit dey head rel hard!!! :roll:

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certified_dealer
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Postby certified_dealer » April 22nd, 2010, 5:04 pm

^^^^^
how hard :mrgreen:

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sharkman121
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Postby sharkman121 » April 22nd, 2010, 5:43 pm

yehhh

dem las 2 iz stsoper

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d spike
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Postby d spike » April 22nd, 2010, 9:04 pm

A young impoverished couple had twins and couldn't keep them, so they put the two boys up for adoption. A Saudi couple adopted one and named him Amal. Later a Mexican family took in the other boy, and gave him the name, Juan.
In later years, the couple tried to get back in contact with their sons. They were able to find Juan's family, who sent pictures of the boy. When the wife was finally able to locate the Saudi family, she spoke to them on the phone for a while. She stopped talking to tell her husband of her luck, and told him the family wanted to know if she wished to see photos of the boy. "Whatever for?" replied the husband. "If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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2 d Max Auto
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Postby 2 d Max Auto » April 22nd, 2010, 9:25 pm

^^ that was funny :lol:

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bassotronics
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Postby bassotronics » April 23rd, 2010, 10:37 pm

so there r 2 aligators on a river bank

so then rain starts 2 fall

n 1 tells the other

aye lewe go in the river so we wuldnt get wet

axe
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Postby axe » April 24th, 2010, 8:33 pm

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express
praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the
podium.
She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom,
had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed.
The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could
help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the
congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have
experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on,
"and every move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors
performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to
piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire
around it to hold it in place."
A gain, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice,
"thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that
with time, his scrotum should recover completely." A ll the men sighed
with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone
else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath. "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
:shock: :lol: :lol:

Olivia425
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Postby Olivia425 » April 24th, 2010, 9:15 pm

Image

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sharkman121
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Postby sharkman121 » April 25th, 2010, 11:01 am

Olivia425 wrote:Image


:rofl: :lol: :lol:

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DJShortCircuit
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Postby DJShortCircuit » April 27th, 2010, 12:55 pm

One trini says to another, "hey doesn't manning have a heart?".
The other trini answers, "manning probably doesn't have a heart, but he has something CALLED-AH-HEART!". :D

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DJShortCircuit
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Postby DJShortCircuit » April 28th, 2010, 8:01 am

You are on a maxi when you suddenly realize, you need to fart. The music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat. After a couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop. As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and that's when you realize, you have been listening to your ipod :shock:

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ztune
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Postby ztune » April 28th, 2010, 8:44 am

what did the pastor say to the field?








lettuce pray

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Kongorealm
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Postby Kongorealm » April 28th, 2010, 9:12 am

DJShortCircuit wrote:You are on a maxi when you suddenly realize, you need to fart. The music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat. After a couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop. As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and that's when you realize, you have been listening to your ipod :shock:


Take WIN :lol:

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ztune
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Postby ztune » April 28th, 2010, 10:10 am

beenie man call buju banton and get ah busy signal :?

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